No More Mr. Nice Guy: A Proven Plan for Getting What You Want in Love, Sex and Life (Updated)

Written by:
Robert Glover
Narrated by:
Robert Glover

Unabridged Audiobook

Ratings
Book
68
Narrator
22
Release Date
December 15, 2017
Duration
6 hours 49 minutes
Summary
“One of the best books I’ve ever read on men’s emotional health and development.” Mark Manson, author of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck and Models.

“I have read every self-help book out there, but this was the first that put everything together in a way that made perfect sense to me.”

“Every page of my copy of No More Mr. Nice Guy is highlighted in yellow. How did you know me so well?

A Nice Guy, according to Dr. Robert Glover, a pioneering expert on the Nice Guy Syndrome, is a man who believes he is not okay just as he is. He is convinced that he must become what he thinks others want him to be liked, loved, and get his needs met. He also believes that he must hide anything about himself that might trigger a negative response in others.

The Nice Guy Syndrome typically begins in infancy and childhood when a young boy inaccurately internalizes emotional messages about himself and the world. It is fueled by toxic shame and anxiety. Rapid social change in the late 20th century and early 21st century has contributed to a worldwide explosion of men struggling to find happiness, love, and purpose.

The paradigm of the Nice Guy Syndrome is driven by three faulty covert contracts. Nice Guys believe:

• If I am good, then I will be liked and loved.
• If I meet other people’s needs without them having to ask, then they will meet my needs without me having to ask.
• If I do everything right, then I will have a smooth, problem-free life.

The inauthentic and chameleon-like approach to life causes Nice Guys to often feel frustrated, confused, and resentful. Subsequently, these men are often anything but nice. Common Nice Guy patterns include giving to get, difficulty setting boundaries, dishonesty, caretaking, fixing, codependency, people-pleasing, conflict avoidance, passive-aggressiveness, unsatisfying relationships, issues with sexuality, and compulsive masturbation and pornography use.

Since the publication of No More Mr. Nice Guy in 2003, hundreds of thousands of men worldwide have learned how to release toxic shame, soothe their anxiety, face their fears, connect with men, embrace their passion and purpose, and experience success in work and career. These men have also learned to set boundaries, handle conflict, make their needs a priority, develop satisfying relationships, and experience great sex.

This process of recovery from the Nice Guy Syndrome allows men to move through:

• Depression
• Social anxiety and shyness
• Codependency
• Low self-esteem
• Loneliness and hopelessness
• Feelings of failure
• Lack of confidence and purpose
• Compulsive behaviors and addictions
• Feeling stuck in life

Contrary to what the title might seem to imply, No More Mr. Nice Guy does not teach men how to be not nice. Dr. Glover shows men how to become what he calls Integrated Males. Becoming integrated does not mean becoming different or better. It means being able to accept all aspects of oneself. An integrated male can embrace everything that makes him unique—his power, his assertiveness, his humor, his courage, and his mission, as well as his fears, his imperfections, his mistakes, his rough edges, and his dark side.

If you are ready to get what you want in love, sex, and life, No More Mr. Nice Guy will show you how.
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Reviews
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Trav c

incredible, life changing, gave me a whole new perspective on life, wish I had listen to this book 15 years ago. was so good I went back and listen to it a second time to take notes.

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Robert K.

It was a decent book. I didn't get the life changing experience some of the other reviews described. I would describe it more of a motivational piece than a blueprint on what to do with your life contrary to the title. But I also didn't regret listening to it so I don't want to ding it too hard for that. I just personally wouldn't recommend it as a life changing book but more of a good support book worth listening to.

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Carlton C.

The author did a great job with the messaging and flow of the content that keeps you engaged. Without putting the work into making practice some of the suggested actions, you will call back into unsuccessful practices. Then you will just have to reread as I am doing ;-)

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James B.

Great book, decently read.

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Yuri R.

This book should be required reading. I will definitely listen to it many more times.

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Anonymous

I liked the perspective

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Tim T.

I'm 54 and in a season of change: looking for a new job/career. This book was helpful for my thinking process of how to go about finding it.

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Matthew W.

This book has come along at the perfect time in my life. I can relate to 80% of its content and I'm looking forward to practicing what the book teaches, thank you Richard Cooper for introducing me to Robert Glover.

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